Dec 7, 2007
Note: New posting on my Shop Talk series....please check it out...
Oh, how I miss you all and thank you so much for the kind and concerned emails you sent me. First, please allow me to apologize for worrying you and for just falling off the radar for a bit. I have a list of reasons (or excuses as some may call them), but the main reason? I just pooped out. I had a lot of adjustments, challenges, and personal issues that came full force these last 5 months or so. And sometimes, even the most energetic, optimistic, always-seeing-the-silver-lining-kind-of-person can hit a dry spell. I was simply spent. In fact, for a while, not only "spent" but sometimes I felt a deficit as well.
In this Dec issue of Redbook magazine, Shania Twain gives an interview in which I can relate to a certain extent. I don't have the article right in front of me, but she states that while she doesn't want everyone to "know her dirt" she still wants to "remain real." I totally understand her feelings. While I always want to be "real" with you all, I don't necessarily want to share (or rather bore) you with all my "dirt."
But I will share at least some "dust" with you. Several months ago I found myself suddenly flying home to Texas after getting a call from my sister that my mother broke her back and was also diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease - which seemed to affect her fairly quickly. She had to move out of my brother's home and into a nursing home and will be confined to a wheelchair the rest of her life. It is also sad to "lose" your mother and yet she is still alive. While sitting with her at the hospital, there were times she didn't know who I was or why I was there. I know I am not the only daughter who ever dealt with this, but it is never easy to witness what is to only become worse with time.
My own health has been a challenge as well. I have been in chronic pain for about a year now and the last several months the pain has been sporadic at best, and extremely unbearable at worst. I am a disabled vet and part of my disability is sciatica or performis muscle syndrome (caused during training from running 16 weeks on cement in combat boots). This pain can make just sitting unbearable at times, sleeping can be impossible, and forget running - which I love to do. I have been in physical therapy several times a week for weeks now and I seem to spend more time at the doctors' than in my own home. I am not used to living in chronic pain, and those of you out there that do...God bless you...I am use to being "healthy and strong" and not having my body work in perfect order is not fun....as many of you probably know first hand.
These things, along with some additional personal challenges and other life disappointments eventually drain a person and soon sleep deprivation takes it toll. Then focus, concentration, and creativity are the first to be tested. And once focus and concentration are drained, then even the most joyous of activities (like writing this blog) seem overwhelming. So having said that, rest, recluse, and reassessing the situation are in order. And so that is what I have been doing these last months...resting, staying under the radar, and reassuring myself that I am only in a tired slump, and that like most things, it is only temporary.
I then begin to wonder if I should share this with you, or just blog a design and photo blog and pretend that I never "disappeared" for several months, and continue as before...or...should I remain real (as I always tried to be) and share with you some of my challenges I have been experiencing these last months. I decided on the latter simply because I like to share but mostly because I know there are many of you out there that enjoy reading my blog for inspiration (thank you so much) but maybe it will comfort you to know that even a creative and very energetic person such as myself has moments in which the creative flow doesn't flow so well, or the energy level can drop off, or that sometimes, life hands you situations that simply take priority.
So my dear friends, I hope I didn't lose too many of you and I want to share so many things with you in the near future! And I will share more with you in future blogs, but for now, please know that I have an article out in the Jan 08 issue of Romantic Homes magazine as well as the Feb 08 issue and the April 08 issue. Below are some photos from the Jan issue - only a few - you will have to buy the issue to see the rest! :-) I will show you a sneak preview for the April issue in the next blog. I also have plans to do another shop talk posting as well. I have other big news to share - but that will come later as well.
Thank you so much for your concern - your emails truly touched my heart. And my heart is feeling a little more rested, a little more hopeful, and a lot more happier now. I hope to come back "full force" in the new year with inspirational blogs, ideas, photos, and more.
The photos below are from my photo shoot for the Jan 08 Romantic Homes issue (on the stands now). The feature is how to have an intimate private party for two on New Year's Eve in a little corner of your home. The article called "A Moment in Time."
Please enjoy the photos!
from my house to your house,
P.S. Thank you my dear Sharon for strongly encouraging me to share my challenges...and to "dip back into the inkwell" again...