Dec 1, 2012

I'm Benched



Too much going on and I'm down for the count.

It's been one of those months....


This is not the post I planned on writing at all...and I'm probably not going to sound like my usual self, as I am still all medicated up, and I am sure I will just be blunt, and to the point, and I must beat the blurs, as I will explain in a moment.

I will say that November began abruptly with me in the ER with a very painful kidney stone. And just a week later I had knee surgery (scheduled). All was well with the knee for two days, then back into the ER I went with a very painful blood clot and I was admitted into the hospital for a couple of days to adjust for blood thinners and shots I had to administer myself. Once out of the hospital, I was back in the ER again, this time for stroke symptoms. The whole bit...my left side feeling heavy, shortness of breath, dizzy, weakness, and never mind I have a blood clot in me...but it turned out (thank God) to be an anxiety attack.




So back home I go, feeling very grateful. Nothing changes you so quickly, as it does while you lie on the table getting a CT scan, and feeling very weak, and wondering if your life is about to change drastically, and why did is this happening? It is very scary having three ER techs running all around you sticking things on you, reading lab slips, taking blood, doing EKG, and mumbling a lot of stuff and all I know is that I can't hold my cell phone in my left hand without it shaking. I ended up feeling stupid  when I found out it was "only an anxiety attack." But then I realized, "stupid"? why in the world would I want it to be anything but that? The doctor reassured me that with me having a kidney stone, then knee surgery, then a blood clot, and so on, that anxiety attack wasn't surprising. 

Then the two days later I am back in the ER again, yes again, for the most painful event in my life. I was standing near my sofa, and I barely bent over, and many blood vessels, underneath my kneecap burst open and since I was now on blood thinners due to the blood clot, it was one very, very painful mess in the ER for about six hours before I got any medical relief. I would gladly take 20 kidney stones at one time, before I ever go through that again. 


I need a drink...


So I was admitted into the hospital again, this time for six friggin days, and knocked out with meds for three days to control the horrific pain. I finally got home the week of Thanksgiving, and I am currently bedridden. My living room looks like a hospital ward with my wheelchair, potty, crutches, brace, walker, blood thinner shots, tons of meds, bandages...actually, more like a MASH unit. 

I am currently exhausted, and recovering and will begin PT this coming week. I can walk on crutches, and can do it well, but I am supposed to keep my leg up until I get my PT going. It is very surprising to me how tired I get though. This is frustrating as I am a mover, doer, going, and this is a horrible time of the year to not be able to cook, decorate, or shop. I am ready to blast through PT...we'll see :)

I'm going to have to cut this short, as the meds have a side affect of having me see "the blurs" and then double after only a short time of reading or writing, but I am told this will wear off soon. (I hope so...I love to read...but seeing things twice, isn't much fun actually.)




It's funny how life will throw you a real curve ball at times, you know? Just sorta sucks when you aren't wearing a mitt to catch it because boy does it stings when it gets you. This time last year, my posts were so very different. 

But that's okay.

I think the time to really start worrying is when life quits throwing those curve balls at you. Because when that happens, that means you aren't in the game anymore. And being in the game is what life is all about. 

I am just benched for now. Just for now.  :-)

From my house to your house,



Signature

56 comments:

Jennifer @ Town and Country Living said...

Wow. I do hope you get better soon. Just said a prayer for you. You seem to have a wonderful attitude despite your current challenges.

Burlap Luxe said...

Elizabeth, I am happy it's all down hill from here, and that now you can be on the mend from it all.
Those anxiety attacks are the worst, I have experienced them myself, those alone make you feel like you are going to die.
I sent you a ThanksGiving greeting via U.S Post I hope it got to you ok and on time.
This was still a great post even with the sad, and horrific information on what you have gone through, it's those beautifully poetic photos you add that leaves us in awwww!

A simple pine branch in a vessel and call it a beautiful Nordic Christmas for you. It will look divine with your back drop of beauty.

Take care my friend, you are loved.
Blessings and Prayers to you.

Come visit soon, take notice of what I posted gearing up for a simple, calm, peaceful Joyeux Noël

Xoxo
Doré

amy of four corners design said...

take care of yourself...it sounds like it you have been having quite a struggle - I feel for you and hope that you are now on the road to recovery!

Claudia said...

Oh Elizabeth! I am so so sorry that you have had such a terrible time of it! Goodness, friend, just ONE of those incidents would be enough to bench me, but all of that? Bless you for even being ABLE to write about it. I am sending prayers and love your way. I wish I lived near you - I would come over and decorate. You could sit there and direct me (I was an actress, you know, and take direction well) and I would make everything look Elizabeth-like for the holidays. Love to you. Write if you need to talk.

xoxo
Claudia

Low Tide High Style said...

Wow, you have truly been through the mill! Wishing you a quick recovery and I hope you take all the time you need to heal...Christmas can wait!

Kat

Debra @ Common Ground said...

E. Adorable E, I didn't realize it had been this bad. I've talked to Anne, and emailed you this last week. I'm so so sorry you've had to go thru this mess, I'll be up next week and give you a call to see how things are going. Take is easy, and rest. That's best for you now. Let God and Randy take care of you. I'm sending my love, Debra

Jennifer Pearson Vanier said...

It's always something but you seem to have collected all possible challenges at once. I pray that you will be feeling more yourself soon and that there will be no further surprises but only good ones for the remainder of the year. ( When it comes to blood thinners keeping your diet low in vitamin K is important and keeping what you eat consistent is important too. My hubby has been on them for 17 years now and those weeks he has too many salads or other high vit. K foods, wreak havoc with his INR tests.)

Kelley Highway said...

Prayers for you, my dear. Had been wondering what you'd been up to lately. Wow. You need our prayers; you've got 'em!

~Kelley

Rhonda said...

I do wish you a speedy recovery, as I know how busy you are. Life sure does throw us curve balls....it can pull the rug out from underneath us in a heartbeat. Standing back up and feeling stronger - is the best feeling. Sending hugs and prayers, Rhonda

The French Bear said...

OMG, it sounds like my year that started in January falling down the stairs......I do hope you recover fast and feel better quickly!!! I'll send you a big cyber hug, hope it helped, lol!
Cheers,
Margaret B
xx

Sweet Old Vintage said...

Hi Elizabeth...thinking of you and sending thoughts and best wishes for a healing hand to touch and make your recovery swift and peaceful.... I also have also been in recovery and well realize how we are effected...I fought cancer this summer and just had my 3 month check up Thursday and at this time I seem to have beaten it....surgeon said all was normal and those are comforting words... I am trying to enjoy every moment offered and enjoy all the beauty of the season for the right reasons... Have been viewing all the lovely and creating decorating... Hitting pin interest also and seeking out pinned Christmas.. wow... Lovely... Sending you the best and hoping you have a happy and joyous peaceful Christmas... I enjoy the quiet moments and run from any drama at this point in my journey of life....

oldgreymare said...

I am sorry to hear of your troubles.This time of year makes it seem worse. Now the lecture..Be good, do as you're told, do all your PT gratefully, as you do still have legs.. and Christmas will be just as it should..spent with your loved one eating good food and friends stopping by. Decorations are not the holiday. LOVE is the holiday and you WILL mend and be your old feisty self, and we'll all be waiting here to hear and see you, so go to sleep and rest and be strong.

Merry Christmas from a knee surgery (actually both knees) and mini stroke fellow gal.... <3
z

Mary said...

So very sorry to hear of these challenging health issues you been going through dear - however you seem to be on the road to recovery at last thankfully. My good wishes, prayers, and big get well hugs are coming your way - hope you will post again soon and share better news with us.

Chin up, hang in there, just know better days are ahead.........we're all puling for you sweet Elizabeth.

Mary XOXOXO

Elizabeth Maxson said...

What a nice surprise to wake up this morning (or rather early afternoon) and find such lovely and caring comments from my cyber friends. I will admit, your thoughtful words made me tear up. Sometimes it is easy to lose perspective when on your back, leg up, for basically 3 solid weeks....and it is nice to be reminded that others really care and love you.

I will reply to each of you a little at a time, and know to those who have experienced such hardship lately, I am so sorry as well...and will say prayers of thanks that you are healing too.

Thank you for starting out my new month with a better perspective and wishing you all a very nice Christmas season - you represent the spirit of the real reason we celebrate this time of year.

Big hugs and love
Elizabeth

SuzyMcQ said...

Oh, Elizabeth, am so, so sorry for all that you have been going through. Despite your trials and tribulations I can see your loving and positive spirit peeking through, what an incredible inspiration you are.

I am sending you many good healing thoughts and prayers for days that are more good than bad, healing and bright.

Revi said...

Bless you, Elizabeth. May God work good from this horrible time you've been going through, and may it be over soon.
-Revi

Georgia Gibbons said...

i will keep you in my prayers. Take care of your self. Maybe God just wants you to slow down a little. Rest and mend.

Debe said...

I was wondering where you had gone. Sorry that it has been the wrong kind of busy. I do hope you have seen the last of hospitals. Offering prayers for your recovery. Bless your heart!

Anonymous said...

Elizabeth, you don't remember me but I stopped by your shop to meet you when I was visiting from the OR coast. I check your blog often to keep up with you and your marvelous life. I'm so glad you've had the strength to prevail over the tremendous trials/events in your life. You are in my thoughts and prayers--don't try to respond to my message--save all your energy for getting well. Love and hugs, Allegra

Auntie Bliss said...

I am not much of a mover as my MS tires me wayyy too quickly but I always see that you ARE a busy girl!!! So many ideas to do! I don't like that you have been stopped in your tracks and have had scary scary times with pain as well...
I'll be praying for you a good healing and for God to get lots of glory!

KarenB said...

So sorry to hear about all this mess! I totally understand since one year ago, my husband had a blood clot in his lung after returning on a long flight from Australia. Very scary indeed! Take care of yourself and take it S L O W. The blood thinners are nasty stuff and hopefully you won't have to be on them for more than 6 months. I'm praying for smooth recovery!
Karen

Sarah K said...

Elizabeth,
So sorry to read this. I hope for a very speedy recovery and so can continue doing all the things you love.

Prayers to you and your family

janzi said...

Well like all the other friends in blogland, I am sending you best wishes for a speedy recovery.. You certainly have had a few balls thrown your way recently.. No wonder you had an anxiety attack... I got those a few years ago, and boy did it seem like the real thing too!! Dont worry about gettingready for christmas, it can take care of itself with friends helping you perhaps... anyway, the anxiety attacks are really the body telling you to slow down, you have been trying to do too much for a long while... I do hope you feel uplifted by all our comments, they are said from the heart... many hugs from across the pond.. Janzi

Anonymous said...

Wow Elizabeth. There was a time 3 years ago that I was hospitalized with fluid on both lungs due to cancer. It was a horrifying time, I couldn't breath, had to have 1 procedure and 1 surgery and then life became like a really dull horizontal line. I had the bed set up at home, etc. The holidays came and went. Thank God for my 5 year old daughter at the time who could fetch things, help me do things and sleep with me in the twin hospital bed every night. Things got better. It was horrible and the anxiety was out of this world. Needed Xanax to help me keep it together. Anyway, all this to say that this too will pass and we are here cheering you on as one who was sidelined but not struck out and is raring in the game now. Love Karen and daughter Rosey says feel better and big hugs

House Things said...

Oh my goodness...you poor thing. I hope things turn up from here. You're in my thoughts and prayers.
Brandon

Pandora said...

OMG - so sorry to hear about your awful month! I read your blog religiously and you inspire me greatly, both with your creative vision and your upbeat way of looking at life. So sorry to hear you are down - hang in there! I know you will get through this and on to a better place real soon. My thoughts are with you.

beth said...

thanks for stopping by my blog !!.....i hate that you are benched and whoa, you have been through a lot lately...i hope you can just rest and feel better soon !!

JAS said...

Yowza Elizabeth!

This has been some kinda fall 2012 for you, but it sounds like it will all heal in time. Your spirit sounds strong and humorous - that is REALLY the best medicine for healing.

I'm sending positive thoughts your way and remember, the Holidays are still the Holidays even if you don't have time/strength to do it all.
Judy

girl on a bicycle said...

Elizabeth-will pray for you.You will be better. It will take time. So happy you are going to be O.K. though.I've had knee surgery with complications and then a major incident at the end of Jan. this year resulting in all the pain meds and physical thearpy, etc. I know you just want to be up and running again...so do EVERy exercise the PT folks give you to do at home. God will hold you and care for you all the way through.

Mary Beth Hunt said...

I am facing knee surgery at some point, so YUCK for all you've gone through. Also, I've been at the Emergency Room with an anxiety attack and they had me breathe into a simple paper bag. it is AWFUL.

I've been checking your blog, hoping for an update....wondering if I should post a little note saying hello.......hoping you were doing well.....My instincts were right. But I was SO glad to finally see an update!

You are headed in the right direction now and I hope that with each passing day, you feel more rested and have less pain and more movement.

PLEASE keep us all posted.

Fondly, Mary Beth from Nebraska, your Creative Connection Stalker :)

Sandi~A Cottage Muse said...

So sorry you have had to go through all this ~ sending you a hug!
I know how you feel, having gone through open heart surgery when they found a tumor (benign) on my heart almost two years ago. Wish I had a catcher's mitt myself! Please be good to yourself and don't push too hard. Soon enough you will be back on your feet and hopefully turning that MASH unit into "the swamp" and looking back and toasting yourself and the strength you found to go through it!

Laraine Lord said...

We are always warned that operations can go wrong but we never expect it to happen to us. I hope the new year is kinder to you. Don't fret the small things - get well!
Laraine

LP Vintage said...

Sending my wishes and prayers for a magical recovery! Blessings of the Season to you and yours!

Elizabeth Maxson said...

Thank you again for the encouragement and for sharing your personal and heartfelt stories. Your stories are such a reminder that we all have them, and we all endure in our own ways...even with a little 5-year old helping out :-)

And you are right about the blood thinners being difficult; my home healthcare worker was here today to take my vitals and blood test and I tested way too low and I have to start giving myself the shots in the belly again. I will admit, I started to tear up when I called up my barber husband to give him the news, as I felt like I "failed" some test or did something wrong. But he went food shopping tonight and found ways for me to have a more steady diet that I can handle on my own during the day and hopefully I will be off the shots soon.

So many of you wrote to remind me that "this too will pass" and I appreciate it. Tomorrow I begin my PT and have mixed feelings about it.

I so wish I could bring holiday cheer to you and post beautiful holiday photos...I feel very much out of my element right now, but I guess I will just thank you again for being just who you are: very special to me.

Big hugs and love
Elizabeth

Jacquelene L. said...

Elizabeth I have been checking in regularly and wondering where you were. I am sorry you have gone through so much. I will be praying for healing and for your recovery. I thank God it wasn't a stroke. Get lots of rest and focus on your recovery, but don't rush it, one day at a time. I am believing for a full recovery for you and that you will be living a full life again in the future.
Jacquelene L.
Canada

Curtains in My Tree said...


Oh gosh Elizabeth so sorry you had to experience this also.
I know just what you are talking about , everything expect the knee surgery

I wish I lived closer I would be over to help you . I still need help since my 4 bulging disks in my back threw me a curve ball and I am a doer and goer also just like you

well honey now I am a wish somebody would come over and vacuum for me person

So hopefully buy spring I am cleaning out my house of all vintage goodies I have collected because no one in my family wants them , guess I am downsizing, I have things stuffed under over and in everything

Anyway you have your cute barber husband to help you and I am sure friends close

Thank God you made it through all this and able to write an update on your blog which I always enjoy

Take care as they say , when leaving our houses of gloom and bedpans, and crutches, and 10 bottles of pills on our night stands and our TV remote LOL

Janice

Rene Foust said...

Jeeze Louise!!!! What a heck of a time you have had, I was having an anxiety attack just reading what you have had to go through. I hope you have a very quick recovery and a quick return to the game!

Tina said...

Love you! HUGS! Continue to take care of YOU.... and get better my dear! It will be wonderful soon enough as He has planned!

Anne Marie said...

oh my Elizabeth...I am so very sorry to hear what you have been through...

i do have to say, that many devout Catholics I know are undergoing severe pains and hardships, and I do think it is God's way of making us stronger.....it is 'the age of the martyrs'

nice eh? I sound like I am saying 'toughen up...' but please don't think that....it's not what I mean...I am meaning to give you support and prayers and I guess if you need some good books, grab any book on any saint....

"along the way of the cross" as it goes.......

many advent blessings + I will pray your suffering is over!
-Anne Marei

Anonymous said...

O, my! This made me cry. I am so sad that you have been through such a horrible ordeal.

Thoughts, prayers, and love...sending your way!

kim

Donna said...

With each day I will pray you will feel improvement, and soon this will be an adventure of the past.

thopkins1202 said...

I am so sorry for everything that has happened, but absolutely love your outlook on life. You are an inspiration. You get your rest, everything else will fall into place. Maybe someone is telling you to slow it down some. God bless you dear person.

Tracy from Houston

Nelda Ream said...

so sorry to hear about your health challenges, Elizabeth. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Cathy Hickman said...

Dear Elizabeth,
It is all a grand adventure. Even some of the most duanting life issues are a moment that will have a silver lining in the future. So hope your up & running very soon. In the mean time take good care of yourself. We all adore you & wish you a speedy recovery.
All The Best,
Cathy

Boxwood Cottage said...

Oh dear Elizabeth what an awful time you had to go through I feel so sorry for you, but I'm also glad to know that you are on the mend now!
Hope you have friends coming over to distract you and help you decorate your home for Christmas. I sure would if I lived close enough.
Sending you very heartfelt Christmas wishes from snowy Germany my friend!
xoxo~ Carola

P.S. Just a thought regarding your health issues, because I really care for you and think of you as a very sensible person. Have you ever thought about becoming vegan? It's not difficult at all these days and there are countless yummy better and healthier possibilities out there than animal proteins and fat. I did it a little over a year ago and I feel so much better now in so many ways that I can only recommend it. Here is a very interesting link for you:
http://www.compassionatecook.com/

Monica said...

I have you on my blogroll and never commented on your blog before- better late than never, right? :) I am so sorry for what happened, but glad you wrote about it. Sharing brings a little bit of healing itself.
Big cyber hugs from across the pond, and be sure that positive vibes and prayers are sent your way!
Monica xo

www.MaisonStGermain.com said...

Awwww...Wow! You been through so much!!!I am wishing you good thoughts, a quick recovery and prayers too:)Take this down time to enjoy some calm in your life. I know it has to be tough for someone who is always on the go. I read that Debbie is on her way over to see you. That should be a great pick- me- up. Bless you and Merry Christmas to you and your husband:)
~Debra xxx
Capers of the vintage vixens

Chatelaine said...

Lots of curve balls being lobbed your way. I am a reader of your blog but rarely comment.

I will keep you in my prayers. I am sure things will get much better soon and the worst is over.

Alabaster Rose Lifestyle said...

Oh dear Elizabeth, what an ordeal you've been through!!!
I am keeping you in my prayers and sending you lot's of positive thoughts for a peaceful recovery!
Sincerely,
Melinda

Judi said...

Blessings to you as you continue your recovery. I love the fact that even though your down, your not out. Still styling a beautiful picture for this post. Get your husband to put a bow on the "potty" and BAM Christmas decorating done.
God bless you, and Merry Christmas.

Judi in Wahoo

Leslie said...

Big prayers and positive energy from me to you! You have been through so much and have had to be so brave. I wish you patience and strength.

rivka said...

I am a looooong time fan....back from your article in Mary Englebreit Home Magazine. I adore your blog and reading about your adventures and your beautiful aesthetic.

I feel horrible for you....the physical stuff holding you back must just add to the pain. Just look at each day as it comes. I'm sure your dear husband is being a huge support to you and thank goodness for family.

Remember one day at a time...don't look to the future...just take this step by step.....

Anonymous said...

get well soon-hope you have a Merry Christmas and get off the bench.

Sandi said...

Oh Elizabeth...I am so sorry for what you have gone through. I can't imagine the knee pain because I have had TWO kidney stones and I thought that was the worst pain ever!! Wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy..lol. I pray that you are finally on the mend and that the new year is fabulous for you and yours!!
Blessings~

*The Beautiful Life* said...

Elizabeth, I'm just reading this and I am soooo sorry!!

You got MORE than your share all at once, there!!

I hope yesterday (Christmas) was VERRRRY relaxing for you.

I can't wait to see what 2013 brings us in the way of wonderment from you. :)

Hugs and many well-wishes!!!

Ruth

P.S. -- no need for a reply! You just chill, pamper yourself, and take care of YOU! Dr. Ruth says!

Martha bunch said...

You are a very special lady. Your faith and aesthetic both continually inspire me. I pray God will show you His hand in specific, tender ways as you heal.

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